My bicycle is out of reach. It’s permanently squashed in “my” corner of our overstuffed garage. Two flat tires, the seat is gone, and I don’t know where the lock is. I have thought I’d like to ride it. Maybe take it to a park, but of course, I don’t know where the key is. In front of my bicycle lives the vacuum cleaner, Teflon pots, laundry, dry cleaning, and bottles of shampoo.
I replaced the pedals a few years ago so I could add foot loop straps and I changed the handlebars so I could better reach them. I gave my seat away because it hurt my butt, now I need a new one. I’d like to make this bike work for me but there are obstacles. It’s hard to imagine where my bicycle would live if it left the crowded and inaccessible corner of the garage; not to mention, it’s hard to justify the expenditure of more money to make it “just right.” So my bike sits, literally and figuratively out of reach.
Out of the blue today, a good friend called and told me that she and her partner were on their way to a bike shop to get their bikes overhauled so they could enjoy riding this spring. I felt envious. She said they wanted to get more enjoyable exercise and save money on gas. That news coupled with my irritation about procrastinating slightly unlocked my inertia, ambivalence, and just plain resistance. I decided I will make it a point to track down the name of that good neighborly bike shop and haul my bike down there. Who knows? It might even happen.
As I think about obstacles we encounter when approaching something we want that is good for us, it can be very confusing. It is hard to know what is real or fabricated, making it hard to challenge ourselves at these edges. The community support I was given through my friend’s sharing her pleasure and enthusiasm about her bike gave me a nudge. This reinforced my growing belief that we need to share what is hard for us, what we want, and what we will and will not allow ourselves to have. The sharing makes it real and gives it new life.
As you think about your own desires and interests, please give some thought to what gets in your way and feel free to share anything you like in response to my blog. I appreciate your reading it.
With peace,
Deborah